I love to drive fast - always have and I blame my parents. They didn't speed everywhere, but never believed in wasting perfectly good forward momentum...they would race to a red light or stop sign and brake at the last second, and I don't think we ever realized that wasn't what normal people do until we had been driving on our own and got back into the car with one of them, muffling a high-pitched scream at the first couple stops. Handsome Strangers finger impressions were forever imbedded in our car dashboards early in our marriage - he still is not entirely comfortable with my driving style, but I like to point out to him that he's had several "Make your mother go gray in an instant" vehicular incidents that he should never have walked away from unscathed while I have had nothing but a couple minor fender benders. Except the head on with my neighbor on the driveway quite a few years ago which my insurance company deemed 100% her fault because she was on the wrong side of the road on a blind corner. And I still went to work that morning, and did not total a car AND a combine at the same time.
Poor people have limited options for vehicles, so we drove a motley collection back in the day - one of my best finds combing the local paper's "Auto's for Sale" ads was HS's prized 68 RS Camaro for $500...it was a giant POS, which now we call a "project car", but at the time we had nothing else so he made it run and I drove it. Rough and with more than a few safety issues (Fred Flinstone holes rusted in the floor), that sucker FLEW and I was more than happy to take it down the local runway, even with kids strapped in car seats in the back. Yeah, I know....but back then we did a lot of stupid things we weren't informed by every billboard, newspaper and fb article would kill us. And I should be driving Nascar anyway - if you question that just try to keep up with me on my way to work in the morning.
One of the items on the "Needs fixin/can't afford it" was a broken motor mount. You had to be careful and feather the gas when starting out, or the forward momentum of the car would cause the engine to lift, which caused the throttle spring to stretch waaaaaay out, sucking the gas pedal to the floor and sending you on your merry way like a rocket ship on crack. I was quite pregnant with Son #2, and I believe both of the other kids were strapped in the back while we sat in the local gas station getting $5 worth of gas I had to dig under the seats and scrape green pennies out of the console to afford. I paid for my gas, started her up and lightly tapped on the gas. Did I mention this procedure was touchy? The gas station I was at used to sell milk in bottles....it had a covered pump area with a brick building on one side, and had a carwash directly behind it. To exit you had to creep around a one lane alley between the building and the carwash, and when she took off that day, all I could do was hang on, crank the wheel, and say a prayer in that nano second that no one was on the other side of that building.
I cut a perfect cookie from the pump to the other side of the building, and was standing on the brake with both feet and my butt off the seat (no mean feat when you're 8 months pregnant) when the motor finally dropped and she stopped. I still don't know why I didn't wet my pants, but could not speak for a moment when the attendant who had pumped my gas ran up to my window with eyes as big as hubcaps and yelled "Are you OKAY??!!"....I was still trying to remember how to breathe. There was a perfect "C" of rubber on the blacktop at that gas station for a long time....and SOMEONE got his arse handed to him on a platter with still shaking hands when he got home from work that day. The kids were totally unfazed...they probably just thought they were riding with Grandma.
Speaking of cookies, I have not posted for so long I figured I would throw you a bone and give you one that is naughty and delicious with no regard for calories/points/the way your pants fit for the next week or so until you eat lettuce for a couple days and work out every minute you're not sleeping/working/driving. Yes, they are that good...but be careful, right out of the oven they will hurt you if you aren't VERY careful...molten caramel will do that. As will a broken motor mount...
Rolo Cookies
Found this in a search for some different Christmas cookies...but it's not really holiday-ish, just decadent and special. They are also quite huge...the other day I saw a bag of mini Rolos and think I DID wet my pants thinking about making these baby sized - but regardless, they are totally worth having to peel the foil off a whole bag of Rolos.
1 C. sugar
1 C. brown sugar
1 C. butter
2 eggs
2 tsp. vanilla
1 tsp. baking soda
2-1/2 C. flour
3/4 C. cocoa (I, of course, use my lovely dark cocoa)
13 oz. bag Rolos, unwrapped (DANGER...)
Sugar for rolling
Blend sugars and butter until fluffy, add eggs and vanilla and blend well. Beat in dry ingredients until a soft dough forms. You can use two cookie scoops of this dough, press one flat, put a Rolo on it and then press the other on top, sealing the edges of the top and bottom dough pieces around the Rolo. Roll in sugar and put on cookie sheet, leaving LOTS of room - 6 per pan because they spread out to be pretty large, and will be fairly flat when baked. Bake at 375 for 7-10 minutes...just check the divots in the middle to make sure they don't look too wet. Let them cool a couple minutes, then CAREFULLY remove them to a rack - if they break they will make a mess, and you will probably wonder how sanitary it is to be licking caramel off the counter/stove/floor/your slippers. And they really will burn you if you eat them too soon...BE CAREFUL! Still warm the caramel still oozes a bit, and even stone cold it has a soft and chewy quality inside an intensely chocolatey and fudgy shell - they are TRULY spectacular!
Enjoy, and don't say I didn't warn you - eat too many and you won't be able to squeeze into the Hershey's Rolo pace car for the Indy 500 lbs. And be careful out there; you never know when a crazy preggo is gonna come flying outta nowhere to leave skid marks across your spare tire.
Showing posts with label Cookies. Show all posts
Showing posts with label Cookies. Show all posts
Friday, February 8, 2013
Friday, August 26, 2011
It's a GIRL!!!
I guess I can't proclaim myself an expert on raising girls since I only have the one, but I was one myself, so I think I can take a little from that experience and the fact that I came out alive on this end of 18 and say that I'm at least semi-pro. My first-born and only female child has been on the other side of the country (might have just as well been the universe) for almost 13 years, so when she and my 10 year old grandson moved back to Oregon in September, I was tickled pink. And they are living IN OUR HOUSE....I think that's fitting, at least for now since she has deprived me of her company and my grandson for this long. I will never tire of being a gramma and wish that I had more than one to spoil, side with against his mom, and teach him bad words (it was an ACCIDENT).
We have similarities, she and I; I don't think either one of us leaps into friendship easily, probably in part because of a couple hard hits in childhood, but when someone does crack our hard candy shell, you can pretty much be sure that they'll be front and center at our funeral, crying and laughing harder than anyone else in the room. We have the same snarky sense of humor, and we are both extremely common-sensical - we both like things the way we like them, and God help anyone who gets in the way of that.
On the other hand, my lovely daughter has FAR more patience that I ever did or will have with her child, she is FAR more independent and fearless than me (Holy hand-grenades, Batman - she joined the ARMY), and I think she has a much more creative soul than I do. Sure I like to cook, but because of a LOT of food experience/exposure, I think I know what will work and what won't, but it's really stolen from others. I can pull a rabbit out of my hat, with a sweet cherry and Syrah reduction, roasted garlic, fried sage and Asiago mashed Yukon Golds and butter browned julienned Brussels sprouts with toasted hazelnuts, but most of the time someone else put it in there. I don't think either one of us knows what we want to be when we grow up, but have vague thoughts that it should involve writing, and/or comedy...and for me cooking for sure. I think it's about time the Food Network acquired a stand-up chef with excellent spelling skills.
She has been gone a looooong time - an average once a year visit from one end or the other and 13 years flew by. She was already so grown up (from 6th grade on), but she matured in that time, found love, a new home, new interests, and even became a mother, all without us there. And never seemed to be scared or worried about anything - she is either the greatest actress of all time, or she really IS that independent....and having a partner who leaves for year at a shot over and over pretty much cements that notion. But family is family, and I think she realized just like I did when she left that she was missing out - you can email, call, even visit from time to time all you want, but it ain't the same as BEING THERE. And in my opinion life is too short to throw that away unless you have a REALLY good reason. And what that would be I have NO idea.
It's different having a kid in the house, adding two more bodies to a one-bathroom home, and doubling the female hormone level...tread lightly, you who leave the seat up, your comeuppance has just doubled. I know that we can't always agree, that there will be bickering and petty annoyances for us all from time to time, but it matters not. On the walls of every cubicle I have had in the last 12 years, I have two midnight blue post it notes I laminated and neatly trimmed with Velcro on the back so they'll stick to fabric walls. Written with a metallic pen and covered with stars and hearts, one says "Queen of the Universe", and the other "I *heart* you Mom, Becky". I see them 5 days a week, all day, every day, I remember exactly where I was and what she looked like when she made them, and they are constant reminders of just how much I missed her.
(Author's note: I started this blog before she arrived, and it was here I had to go find Kleenex) When she was in boot camp, she sent home letters detailing her experiences, and I put them in a binder and read them once in while. She was really homesick at first - I didn't expect that, so it was really hard to read about it. One night she was on a bus with a bunch of other prospective girl soldiers, waiting to go off to the next destination, and she wrote that she started to cry when the girl next to her (who she was sure thought she was crazy) started biting her fingernails and spitting them on the seat in front of her just like I do. It was the closest I came to getting on a plane and flying to that base and telling them it was all a mistake, she wasn't supposed to be there and had to come home with me NOW. I still can't read that without having an allergy attack.
We have similarities, she and I; I don't think either one of us leaps into friendship easily, probably in part because of a couple hard hits in childhood, but when someone does crack our hard candy shell, you can pretty much be sure that they'll be front and center at our funeral, crying and laughing harder than anyone else in the room. We have the same snarky sense of humor, and we are both extremely common-sensical - we both like things the way we like them, and God help anyone who gets in the way of that.
On the other hand, my lovely daughter has FAR more patience that I ever did or will have with her child, she is FAR more independent and fearless than me (Holy hand-grenades, Batman - she joined the ARMY), and I think she has a much more creative soul than I do. Sure I like to cook, but because of a LOT of food experience/exposure, I think I know what will work and what won't, but it's really stolen from others. I can pull a rabbit out of my hat, with a sweet cherry and Syrah reduction, roasted garlic, fried sage and Asiago mashed Yukon Golds and butter browned julienned Brussels sprouts with toasted hazelnuts, but most of the time someone else put it in there. I don't think either one of us knows what we want to be when we grow up, but have vague thoughts that it should involve writing, and/or comedy...and for me cooking for sure. I think it's about time the Food Network acquired a stand-up chef with excellent spelling skills.
She has been gone a looooong time - an average once a year visit from one end or the other and 13 years flew by. She was already so grown up (from 6th grade on), but she matured in that time, found love, a new home, new interests, and even became a mother, all without us there. And never seemed to be scared or worried about anything - she is either the greatest actress of all time, or she really IS that independent....and having a partner who leaves for year at a shot over and over pretty much cements that notion. But family is family, and I think she realized just like I did when she left that she was missing out - you can email, call, even visit from time to time all you want, but it ain't the same as BEING THERE. And in my opinion life is too short to throw that away unless you have a REALLY good reason. And what that would be I have NO idea.
It's different having a kid in the house, adding two more bodies to a one-bathroom home, and doubling the female hormone level...tread lightly, you who leave the seat up, your comeuppance has just doubled. I know that we can't always agree, that there will be bickering and petty annoyances for us all from time to time, but it matters not. On the walls of every cubicle I have had in the last 12 years, I have two midnight blue post it notes I laminated and neatly trimmed with Velcro on the back so they'll stick to fabric walls. Written with a metallic pen and covered with stars and hearts, one says "Queen of the Universe", and the other "I *heart* you Mom, Becky". I see them 5 days a week, all day, every day, I remember exactly where I was and what she looked like when she made them, and they are constant reminders of just how much I missed her.
(Author's note: I started this blog before she arrived, and it was here I had to go find Kleenex) When she was in boot camp, she sent home letters detailing her experiences, and I put them in a binder and read them once in while. She was really homesick at first - I didn't expect that, so it was really hard to read about it. One night she was on a bus with a bunch of other prospective girl soldiers, waiting to go off to the next destination, and she wrote that she started to cry when the girl next to her (who she was sure thought she was crazy) started biting her fingernails and spitting them on the seat in front of her just like I do. It was the closest I came to getting on a plane and flying to that base and telling them it was all a mistake, she wasn't supposed to be there and had to come home with me NOW. I still can't read that without having an allergy attack.
I was told early on I could NOT send goodies from home during basic, and to please not send her anything but letters because you had to do push ups even for those, and they were really mean if someone got a package. I think she moved on to her language training before I was allowed to send anything, and the first was a big box of cookies....her favorite included. I think I cut the recipe out of the paper, but never tried them because they seemed kind of "meh", but she did on a whim and they were wonderful - light, slightly crispy, and so delicately flavored with coconut and vanilla - some things are happy accidents (unless they involve Angry Birds and a potty-mouth gramma...)! Maybe you can put these in your Christmas cookie rotation this year...call em snowflakes, and dream of your world being covered in them when you wake up tomorrow....
Becky's Coconut Crisps
Becky's Coconut Crisps
1 C. butter, softened (2 cubes)
1 C. sugar, plus extra for sprinkling
1 egg
1 tsp. vanilla
1 tsp. almond extract
2 C. flour
1/2 baking soda
1/2 salt
2 C. flaked coconut
Preheat oven to 325. In a large bowl, beat butter a little, then add 1 C. sugar and beat until fluffy; add egg and extracts and beat until well combined. Add baking soda and salt and mix, then add flour and beat until combined, add coconut and mix well.
Using a cookie scoop or two spoons, drop by heaping tablespoon onto a greased or parchment lined cookie sheet. I always scoffed at recipes that used parchment paper as "foofy", but after using it found that it really does make a difference, and you don't have aluminum flecks on the bottoms from scraping them off the pan if they tend to stick. Just sayin. Sprinkle tops with sugar (you can use big or regular sugar....I kind of like regular for more of a "sandy" result), then use a flat-bottom glass dipped in sugar to slightly flatten each one. Bake at 325 for 12-15 minutes, not allowing them to brown. Remove to rack to cool, makes about 40 cookies.
And just for the record, I don't think these shipped terribly well....I recently read that you should ship cookies in a tin with bubble wrap between each layer and it made me laugh....those cookies were enjoyed just as much in powder form as they would have been intact, which would be true of anyone who missed a taste of home! I think they would also be delicious if you melted some dark chocolate in a Ziploc, then cut off the tip and drizzled the tops, but then I think that about EVERYTHING - except liver.
Wednesday, March 23, 2011
The Nut House
So when I was growing up, in the 60's (yes, I know, you weren't even born yet), things were less scary out in the world - we were basically turned loose to wander our surroundings, explore, play, and find our way back when we had exhausted all possibilities of fun to be had, AND it was getting dark and we were hungry. Sometimes we'd go back out in the dark after dinner and play some more until Mom noticed we weren't cleaning our room/doing homework/washing the mountain of dirty dishes and holler at us that it was time to come in. Mom's are NO FUN.
The same went for when we went shopping - I loved it because it gave me new and different places to explore - her regular haunts were Portland and Beaverton, and besides every Goodwill, Union Gospel Mission and Salvation Army in a 50 mile radius, our doctor's office was upstairs at Lloyd Center, so we went there a LOT. Five kids can keep you in tongue depressors and hypodermics (remember when they used to take the needle out and give it to you to play with?) continually - I think for the entire 60's at least one of us had strep at any given time. And we could recite 10 years of Highlights by rote...I always had a secret crush on Goofus, the original "bad boy".....Gallant was such a Momma's boy.
I LOVED Lloyd Center...Mom would take child "D" to the doctor, and the rest of us would scatter in the mall - we fought over who pushed the elevator buttons, would check for security and try to run up the down escalator all the way to the top before someone boarded at the top or suspicious and un-fun loving adults would start paying too much attention to us, or we simply collapsed part way up from running in one place too long and laughing hysterically at how stupid we looked. It was also fun to watch the ice skaters, especially from the bridge. Skating looked like fun, but I wanted to drive the Zamboni - I would've cleaned up that ice in record time, AND popped a few wheelies in the process.
My most favorite thing to do, however, was to go to Morrow's Nut House. The same every time, but like it was the first time EVERY time - it was a candy store like no other, because it also sold nuts. EVERY kind of nut, kept in a heated display case lined up neatly, the smell unbelievable - WOOF. We would occasionally have some pocket change, and would irritate the hell out of the salespeople asking for 1/8th or 1/4 lb or 37 cents worth of whatever we could afford - the bbq peanuts were cheap and delicious, but my favorite was the chili pepitas - pumpkin seeds are possibly the greasiest nut known to man, but SO good...and they were also dangerous because they were quite pointy on one end and could stick in the roof of your mouth if you weren't careful. The gold standard was pistachios, but they were too dear - but there is nothing like the memory of eating a tiny handful of them, and having pink stained fingers, lips and tongue from cracking the shells open. They always used to be dyed red...probably until they determined that kids were falling like flies to whatever cancer that dye caused. Mmmmmm....red #3. But to this day, the memory of a warm sack of nuts...stop your giggling, I'm SERIOUS!! FINE...maybe when you GROW UP...
They also made candy, and had a huge glassed in kitchen where they cooked caramel in a huge copper bowl over a flame, stirring with a big wooden paddle, and sometimes you'd get to watch while they dipped apples on a stick into that bowl and come up with them dripping in thick, creamy caramel and line them up on the counter to set. Some they would dip in a big tray of chopped nuts - I think the signs to "DO NOT touch the glass" were there because of us....and I NEVER got one of those damn caramel apples - if she had to buy one for me, she'd have to buy one for ALL of us...WHY couldn't I have been born of a single-child PROTESTANT family??!! I don't think I've ever bought a caramel apple in my 50+ years....guilt and poverty run deep I guess.
So yeah, this has nothing to do with anything, I just went to Lloyd Center today, and the only nuts there were people actually talking to the guy at the card table next to the Chevy Cruze...which is a decent looking car, but it ain't no Camaro. And now I am going to perform a magic trick, and pull a recipe right outta my arse...voila!
Chocolate No-Bake Cookies
Once again, I am dissing a very old family standard for an upstart newcomer I got a few years ago from a co-worker. Can't help it, they're just better, and there is no "Will it/won't it set up?" question....works every time! Thanks nurse Michelle....since I got this from a medical professional, I also firmly believe they are quite healthy...if you disagree, SHUT IT.
In a large bowl, combine:
3 C. QUICK oats (what did I say about subbing? Don't make me get the wooden spoon...)
3/4 to 1 C. peanut butter - creamy, chunky, I do not care
2 tsp. vanilla
Set aside.
In medium saucepan, combine:
1 cube margarine (yes, killer margarine, NOT butter)
2 C. sugar
4 T. cocoa powder
1/2 C. milk (see? Milk is healthy...)
Heat over medium heat stirring often until well mixed. Turn up to med high, stirring constantly; when it comes to a full, rolling boil (that means it still keeps boiling even if you blow on it until you turn blue and pass out, narrowly missing the corner of the island with your noggin) and count to 15...."One thousand one, one thousand two, one thous..." Just do it. After you get to 15, pour hot mixture over contents of large bowl (remember the oats?) and mix well. As quick as you can, start dropping by spoonfuls onto waxed paper or foil, let cool and harden as long as you can stand.
They actually look like something you might find in a barnyard, something possibly created by an animal that eats oats, but don't let that fool you...they are too good even to throw in the community swimming pool mid August as a joke that will clear the pool and force the hunky lifeguard to don a bunny suit and glove and fish it out with a long handled net and make all the neighbor kids find some other form of entertainment for the next couple days while they empty, sanitize and refill the pool. Not that I know anything about that kind of shenanigans....
Wednesday, January 5, 2011
Trolling for friends....and recipes!
Cookies part deaux! The oatmeal raisin prompted a request for the snickerdoodle, and I do not mean Handsome Stranger. Altho he is sweet, tender in the middle, and is one of my favorite things...but enough with the foreplay, we be talkin' COOKIES.
When I was a kid, my mom made a few different cookie recipes, and she made them well - I remember Chocolate No-Bakes, Russian Tea Cakes, Peanut Butter with the fork marks in em, Toffee Bars, and Our Favorite Cookie, a no-roll sugar cookie. When you're a kid, you usually aren't too picky...a cookie is a cookie, and they were all good, but I think the sugar cookie was my favorite. I don't know if I recall her making snickerdoodles, but I know my sister did - she gave me the recipe I have had for 31 years, but they just never came out like I wanted them to. My SIL made really good ones too, but I think after a couple hard batches, I just gave up...I was cinnamon-deficient for so many years!
Well, not completely deficient - cinnamon rolls have been a staple....but it's not the same as a snickerdoodle. Cookies are pocket friends...just try it with a cinnamon roll and you'll have a linty pastry and a sticky pocket, both of which you'll still want to lick. What kid doesn't smile when they open their lunch box and pull out a baggie with home made cookies in it? What co-worker won't walk all the way to the other side of the building and then litter their keyboard with crumbs that could attract rodents for a treat that did NOT come from a box or bag? And what kind of gramma doesn't have cookies in a jar or at least rolls wrapped in wax paper in the freezer for a quickie...that's one sad excuse for a granny.
I keep two recipe binders in my cookbook collection, and that is where I glue in clippings from the paper or magazines, hand write recipes that have come to me in many different forms, and even put notes on things like catering guidelines and some fabulous pictures of food for inspiration. There is a tiny little list on one page, and it is titled "My Favorite Cookies"....there is a short list, and it tells where exactly the recipe is for it - I have a lot of cookbooks and sometimes I forget which recipe is in which book. It is my memory index, and it works pretty good - if anyone ever broke into my house and stole my cookbooks, I would most likely wither away and die.....I just had a horrifying thought and am now on the lookout for a fire-proof file cabinet! So yes, recipes are important to me, and this one, even being a fledgling, ranks right up there.
This was another labor of love for Belle and Tommy's wedding, and I put a call out on fb to see if any of my homies had a good one that would produce CHEWY ones, not puffy and soft, not hard and crispy. Lucky for me, Shannon, aka "The Troll" ponied up with this offering, which is now on the very tip top of my FAVE cookies....I have waited for this for YEARS, and her recipe exceeded all my expectations. It's actually not like any snickerdoodle I have ever had, so I am even changing the name - but for once in my life, that is the ONLY thing I messed with on this one...it's utter perfection. And "Thank YOU" Shannon AND your Gramma....think of the smiles you are about to share!
Stalkerdoodles
Haha, when I first saw Shannon on fb, I mistook her for a lady I work with of the same name...it was hard to tell because her profile pic was a troll doll. After I friended her, my SIL complained I was "fb stalking" her friends....hence the new name of this recipe!
1/2 C. butter, softened
1/2 C. shortening, BUTTER FLAVORED CRISCO, DUH
1-1/2 C. white sugar
2 large eggs
3 tsp. vanilla
2-3/4 C. flour
2 tsp. cream of tartar
1 tsp. baking soda
1/4 tsp. salt
2 T. white sugar
2 T. cinnamon (NOT a misprint...it's a lot, but it MUST be cinnamon-ey!)
Preheat oven to 400 degrees. Put parchment paper on your cookie sheets if you got it. Cream together butter, shortening and sugar for about 5 minutes; mix in eggs and vanilla and beat until fluffy. Add cream of tartar, baking soda and salt and blend in, then add flour and mix just long enough to incorporate the flour...too long and they will lose their chewiness (as per Shannon).
In a small round bowl, mix 2 T. sugar and cinnamon. Roll dough into 2" balls (I used the medium scoop and cut in half, that's 2 T. per cookie) and toss in cinnamon sugar mixture. Place a couple inches apart - they will spread so don't crowd - and bake for 8 minutes....and ONLY 8 minutes (according to Shannon's gramma...see what I mean about Gramma's?) Remove to cooling racks as soon as humanly possible - it may be 30 to 60 seconds before you can get them off the sheet without ruining them, but I consider those necessary collateral damage. With milk.
For the wedding I made 120 bee-yoo-tiful cookies out of a triple batch - and as I am an expert at this, didn't ruin any so I had to poke a few with my spatula so they were damaged enough to eat. While I am attempting to modify some of my more heinous food behaviors, I like to eat just the middle, less caloric (just let it go) part of cookies where they are the most tender and delicious, with Handsome Stranger right behind me eating the "point-free" crusts. But alas, this time they were good right to the edge, so he was able to keep his blood sugar at an acceptable level during this round, much to his displeasure.
So for all you grannies out there who are cookie slackers, here's your cue - get off that Rascal, put your Life Alert necklace on, and strap on an apron that is the uniform you SHOULD be wearing instead of that velour track suit with the "Worlds Best Gramma" sequined on the back...it's a LIE. Unless Matlock is on....then it can wait.
Which came first, the raisin, the oatmeal, or the whining?
Just gonna say right up front that if you hate raisins, use chocolate or butterscotch chips. Now you have no reason to complain, except that you just ruined this recipe if you use chocolate. Bleah...something about oatmeal, chocolate and spices is just wrongwrongwrong.
My neice just got married on New Year's Eve, and she wanted to have cookies and milk before midnight - her favorite is snickerdoodles, his is oatmeal raisin, and they thought chocolate chip would be a good third. I have a recipe I've used for years for oatmeal cookies, but have never been completely happy with it - it was too thick and not chewy enough. I found out years ago that allspice is the key to MY perfect oatmeal cookie - it doesn't taste right with any other spice or combo in my opinion...and since this is my blog, it's the ONLY opinion. Not to mention the chocolate chip thing....it's a damn oatmeal cookie, people! So I started looking for something new and fantastic, and did I ever say how much I LOVELOVELOVE the internet?? I swear I have found more fabulous recipes by just typing in the name along with the key words "best EVER"...sometimes they just ARE.
So using the word "chewy" as a cue, I came up with three new recipes, and tried each one. I found that cinnamon, as I already knew, makes a wimpy flavored cookie, molasses used in excess makes your oatmeal cookie a molasses cookie, and that soaking your raisins in the egg and vanilla makes them plumper and juicier....and that even a LOT of raisins is not enough if you really love oatmeal raisin. Funny thing - I don't like raisins in my oatmeal...go figure. Someday I want to make oatmeal cookies with prunes....it would be fun to make gigantic ones on a pizza pan with a bunch of whole prunes in each one. I am so weird.
This came from Tasty Kitchen, a site that is within Pioneer Woman's website and consists of reader contributed recipes. I, of course, made changes....but mostly just the allspice thing - I also only had quick oats, and personally believe they make a less dry, more chewy cookie anyway. I think there are 2 key point to this recipe: 1. soak the raisins in the egg/vanilla 2. DO NOT overbake. That is a cardinal sin for cookies....unless you like to eat fruit studded hockey pucks. Following those rules, you should end up with an almost caramel-like flat cookie, studded with raisins, and that will bend without breaking when they are still fresh. They are shiny, brown and beautiful to behold, and have a wonderful warm flavor that the allspice and molasses impart without fighting each other or the oatmeal-raisiness of the cookie - perfect! Enjoy....
Heavenly Oatmeal Raisin Cookies
2 eggs
1 T. vanilla
1-1/2 C. raisins
1 C. butter
1 C. brown sugar
3/4 C. white sugar
2 T. molasses
1-1/2 C. flour
1 tsp. salt
1 tsp. baking soda
1-1/4 tsp. allspice
3 C. quick oats
In a small bowl, beat eggs and vanilla together and stir in raisins. Let stand and soak for one hour.
Preheat oven to 350, line baking sheets with parchment paper (if you don't have it, just put cookies on ungreased pan - I just like using the paper).
Cream butter, sugars and molasses in mixer for 5 minutes. In separate bowl, combine flour, salt, soda and allspice and stir to blend. Add to creamed mixture and mix well, then add egg and raisin mixture and stir, then oatmeal and beat to combine.
I used my medium scoop for these, then cut them in half - that is 2 Tbsp. per cookie. A small cookie is 1 Tbsp, which would work fine for a small cookie, it's just up to you what size you want. I do know that a 2 T. cookie is 3 Weight Watchers points....but if you eat the middle and leave the outsides for your husband, he says they are no points because they're "crust". Don't crowd them on the cookie sheet, they will spread out a bit - I was able to get a dozen per jelly roll pan without too much "grow together". Bake one sheet at a time at 350 for 11-12 minutes - they will look slightly underdone in the center, but should have little tiny divots in the puffy part without looking doughy...kind of like the holes that appear in pancakes. Remove from oven and let stand 2 minutes (they WILL fall apart sooner if you did it right), remove to cooling rack
If you take one out and decide it isn't quite done enough, and you have another pan already in the oven, you can put it in under the other pan for a few minutes...it takes a while to get back up to temp, so it will take another 4 or more minutes to cook what would have taken just one more minute if you just left them alone. But you can also just eat them that way too, they'll just be a little softer....really, how much RAW cookie dough did you eat anyway? Also, leaving them on the pan longer will help a little...that's why it's important to take perfectly cooked ones off in two minutes or less so they don't become overcooked.
And congratulations Tommy & Belle, you are possibly the cutest couple I have EVER seen - and what better way to start off your new life than milk and cookies in the new year? Weddings have become such productions, it's nice to see those little "down-home" touches...and no, I do NOT mean camo wedding garb, or pets as attendants...."class" is not spelled with a "K".
Wednesday, November 17, 2010
It's.....ALIVE!!!!
Damn. I've blogged a post specifically ASKING for recipe requests and only got pity requests from my daughter. Who loves me and knows how fragile my self-esteem is. But when I mention "request" offhandedly, they start pouring in like salt on a slug. My sister-in-law is a regular requester tho, and I suspect she may be compiling a cookbook that she will blindside me with and share none of the billions in profits she'll make from it. Or she just likes delicious food.
Cookies are a grand thing. They are miniature glimpses of heaven, portable rewards for the good things you do in life, like letting someone in traffic, braking for a chipmunk, and opening a door for someone who has their hands full. If you don't do stuff like that, cookies are just a loan against time in heaven....and that corner of purgatory just smells like cookies, but is quite devoid of them. And I would not trust anyone that says they don't like cookies....maybe one or two varieties, but not as a whole - that would be like someone who doesn't like kittens or baby deer or those tiny monkeys that wear diapers and have really big eyes. They might just be the devil...just sayin'.
This is that cookie recipe I got from my husband's family - the one his Grammy scammed off Betty Crocker. I still am not sure how my sister-in-law can make them more thick and lumpy while mine just tend to be flat and chewy, but they taste the same. Which is delicious I tell you...but how can you go wrong with chocolate chip? I'll tell you how, overcook the dang things! So pay ATTENTION and you will be rewarded in this life and the next....after you eat one you will want to RUN out and do nice things for everyone - trust me!
Gramma Meeuwsen's Chocolate Chip Cookies (as stolen from Betty Crocker)
2/3 C. shortening
OK, time to stop for Lesson #1: Son #2 is THE MAN with this recipe, and he recently found out that there are definite differences between using butter flavor and plain shortening. Not just flavor, but texture as well...the butter was a hands-down winner. And when I say "butter", I MEAN butter flavor shortening - do NOT use butter, it ruins the texture of the cookie.
1/2 C. sugar
1/2 C. brown sugar, packed
1 egg
1 tsp. vanilla
1-1/2 C. flour
1/2 tsp. baking soda
1/2 tsp. salt
1/2 C. nuts, coarsely chopped
1-6oz. pkg. chocolate chips
Preheat oven to 375. Beat shortening and sugar until pale and fluffy, add egg and vanilla and beat well. Mix in soda and salt, then add flour and beat until incorporated. Throw in nuts and chips and mix until blended, scrape sides and get ready to drop!
Lesson #2: Use aluminum cookie sheets or jelly roll pans. DO NOT use any coated pan, they are too dark and will torch your bottoms! Hahahs....I mean your cooky bottoms. Not your Aunt Cooky....I see where this is going. No, really - if you have only dark pans, buy new ones or cover them with shiny new foil....the dark absorbs more heat and it will not produce good results!
With your shiny pans, you should have a cookie scoop...but if not, use the two spoon method. Y'know, scoop up a rounded teaspoon (the measuring size, not the one you're holding) and use the other spoon to scrape it off on the pan. Leave plenty of room between cookies....you can fit a dozen on a regular size cookie sheet, 15 on a bigger one, or if you're really good (and I am), you can get 20 to 24 on one jelly roll pan. Start slow....I get pretty mad when they spread and stick together.
Bake at 375 for 8 minutes at first...you should check them then and determine if your oven is defective and they are in flames, or is slow and they look like little wet dough puddles. They should be very close at this point, so you want to check every minute after if they aren't quite done.
Lesson #3: "Done" is a state of mind....you have to BECOME the cooky to know for sure. Signs that point to yes? Slight browning, but only around the edge. Tiny bubbles in the tiny cracks across the middle of the cookie. No more shiny spots on top. That is done. If you aren't sure, you can use a METAL spatula and carefully slide it under one, making sure not to disturb the perfect cooky shape. Flip it over in your hand (use a napkin if you're a crybaby about a little molten chocolate) and the bottom should be barely golden....blow on it twice and bite off half, then do a little "shit my mouth is burning but I will not spit out heaven" dance, then eat the other half because it's cool enough now. There is nothing in this WORLD as good as that cooky at that particular moment, and even tho they cool into something a little different, it's something no one should miss.
Remove pan from oven, let stand no longer than 60 seconds so they firm just enough to not fall apart and get those babies on a cooling rack. Or paper towels. Continue until all dough is gone, and half the cookies you just baked are left....warm cookys are an invitation for thievery. As they cool, they solidify a bit more, but if you did it right, they will be chewy enough to bend rather than snap if you try to break one in half. This recipe is VERY chocolatey...you could double it and use the same amount of chips and it would still be wonderful...but why skimp? Chocolate is good for you. And if you happen to have some nice cold milk, take it in your room with those warm cookies, this is a PG rated blog.
One last thing. It occurred to me that Gramma Meeuwsen died before I met her grandson in the 70's, and she was old then. So it is entirely possible that this WAS her recipe, and that snarky Betty Crocker stole it from HER....we may never know until we get past cooky purgatory and meet them in person. Especially if GM is there but BC is notably absent....she's probably "cooking" SOMEwhere.....
Cookies are a grand thing. They are miniature glimpses of heaven, portable rewards for the good things you do in life, like letting someone in traffic, braking for a chipmunk, and opening a door for someone who has their hands full. If you don't do stuff like that, cookies are just a loan against time in heaven....and that corner of purgatory just smells like cookies, but is quite devoid of them. And I would not trust anyone that says they don't like cookies....maybe one or two varieties, but not as a whole - that would be like someone who doesn't like kittens or baby deer or those tiny monkeys that wear diapers and have really big eyes. They might just be the devil...just sayin'.
This is that cookie recipe I got from my husband's family - the one his Grammy scammed off Betty Crocker. I still am not sure how my sister-in-law can make them more thick and lumpy while mine just tend to be flat and chewy, but they taste the same. Which is delicious I tell you...but how can you go wrong with chocolate chip? I'll tell you how, overcook the dang things! So pay ATTENTION and you will be rewarded in this life and the next....after you eat one you will want to RUN out and do nice things for everyone - trust me!
Gramma Meeuwsen's Chocolate Chip Cookies (as stolen from Betty Crocker)
2/3 C. shortening
OK, time to stop for Lesson #1: Son #2 is THE MAN with this recipe, and he recently found out that there are definite differences between using butter flavor and plain shortening. Not just flavor, but texture as well...the butter was a hands-down winner. And when I say "butter", I MEAN butter flavor shortening - do NOT use butter, it ruins the texture of the cookie.
1/2 C. sugar
1/2 C. brown sugar, packed
1 egg
1 tsp. vanilla
1-1/2 C. flour
1/2 tsp. baking soda
1/2 tsp. salt
1/2 C. nuts, coarsely chopped
1-6oz. pkg. chocolate chips
Preheat oven to 375. Beat shortening and sugar until pale and fluffy, add egg and vanilla and beat well. Mix in soda and salt, then add flour and beat until incorporated. Throw in nuts and chips and mix until blended, scrape sides and get ready to drop!
Lesson #2: Use aluminum cookie sheets or jelly roll pans. DO NOT use any coated pan, they are too dark and will torch your bottoms! Hahahs....I mean your cooky bottoms. Not your Aunt Cooky....I see where this is going. No, really - if you have only dark pans, buy new ones or cover them with shiny new foil....the dark absorbs more heat and it will not produce good results!
With your shiny pans, you should have a cookie scoop...but if not, use the two spoon method. Y'know, scoop up a rounded teaspoon (the measuring size, not the one you're holding) and use the other spoon to scrape it off on the pan. Leave plenty of room between cookies....you can fit a dozen on a regular size cookie sheet, 15 on a bigger one, or if you're really good (and I am), you can get 20 to 24 on one jelly roll pan. Start slow....I get pretty mad when they spread and stick together.
Bake at 375 for 8 minutes at first...you should check them then and determine if your oven is defective and they are in flames, or is slow and they look like little wet dough puddles. They should be very close at this point, so you want to check every minute after if they aren't quite done.
Lesson #3: "Done" is a state of mind....you have to BECOME the cooky to know for sure. Signs that point to yes? Slight browning, but only around the edge. Tiny bubbles in the tiny cracks across the middle of the cookie. No more shiny spots on top. That is done. If you aren't sure, you can use a METAL spatula and carefully slide it under one, making sure not to disturb the perfect cooky shape. Flip it over in your hand (use a napkin if you're a crybaby about a little molten chocolate) and the bottom should be barely golden....blow on it twice and bite off half, then do a little "shit my mouth is burning but I will not spit out heaven" dance, then eat the other half because it's cool enough now. There is nothing in this WORLD as good as that cooky at that particular moment, and even tho they cool into something a little different, it's something no one should miss.
Remove pan from oven, let stand no longer than 60 seconds so they firm just enough to not fall apart and get those babies on a cooling rack. Or paper towels. Continue until all dough is gone, and half the cookies you just baked are left....warm cookys are an invitation for thievery. As they cool, they solidify a bit more, but if you did it right, they will be chewy enough to bend rather than snap if you try to break one in half. This recipe is VERY chocolatey...you could double it and use the same amount of chips and it would still be wonderful...but why skimp? Chocolate is good for you. And if you happen to have some nice cold milk, take it in your room with those warm cookies, this is a PG rated blog.
One last thing. It occurred to me that Gramma Meeuwsen died before I met her grandson in the 70's, and she was old then. So it is entirely possible that this WAS her recipe, and that snarky Betty Crocker stole it from HER....we may never know until we get past cooky purgatory and meet them in person. Especially if GM is there but BC is notably absent....she's probably "cooking" SOMEwhere.....
Saturday, October 16, 2010
"I'll have what she's having..."
"What's your favorite food?" What a dumb question. And impossible to answer - I hate it when asked if I was stuck on a desert island and could only eat one food, what would it be - that never happens, and I refuse to answer on the grounds that it will make me hungry, sad and angry that anyone would even SUGGEST that a person could be limited to one choice. That and the fact that it's silly because how would you keep Ben & Jerry's pistachio ice cream from melting on a desert island? It would be like choosing between your children....unless, of course one was hot fudge and the other oatmeal, then it would be easy.
So what IS your favorite food? Haha, just kidding. Some people are easy - they have identified with a particular food and never sway from that - for instance with my Dad it's always been blackberry pie. Always. My grampa loved nuts. Well, at least we thought he did...it would be funny if he secretly hated them, especially after that Christmas when EVERY single present he opened contained nuts. I live in his house now, and wonder if in some future excavation we discover an archeological dig rife with Planters cans as far back as any of us can remember, all pristine and unopened. My big sister has an ongoing affair with gummy bears. Not worms, not cola bottles, but bears...and they must be Haribo. And she flushes the red and white ones down the toilet so she isn't tempted to eat them when she runs out of the yummy flavors...I am working on having her committed since everyone KNOWS those are the two bestest flavors in the bag. Once I bought her a 5 lb. bag and she told me "never do that again"....I suspect it was like the lost weekend, and that she woke up lying in her back yard with a fruity hangover and the dog licking the gummies stuck in her hair.
If I had to narrow it down to a category, I think the thing I would miss the most if I had to give it up is bread. Not just any bread, but warm from the oven, redolent with yeast, and (yes I know it's more than one food, but shut up and let me finish) with butter, preferably cold and very thinly sliced on each bite so you get the contrast of flavors, textures and temperatures. My gramma, whom I have mentioned before and not in the most glowing culinary terms, once made a wheat sourdough bread I will always hold other breads up against and to which they will always slink away from, trailing their sad little crumbs behind them. We were visiting her at the lake, and it smelled SOOOOO good, and the toast we made with it I can still remember to this day...the dense crumb, the slight heaviness, the tang of the sourdough, the melting butter...WOOF. Thanks Granny, you ROCK.
You'd think after all that I'd give you a recipe for bread. Nope. Someone requested a recipe for cookies that are adult AND kid friendly, and that had no prunes or raisins...an odd request, but if you knew the origin, you'd understand. And I don't care what Harrison says, prunes are delicious, and should be tossed into anything you make - it will give it a nuance and depth you cannot imagine, and will delight your body with TONS of antioxidants, potassium, iron and chromium for good blood health, vitamin A & C for beautiful skin and hair, Lutien for good eyesight and for slow-release sugars to keep your energy up, and of course fiber. Shit, prunes give you a run for your money! Hahahah....
These cookies are from a cookbook that my mom has had since I was a kid. It was a church cookbook, so it had recipes donated by parishoners....I think this one was actually donated BY my mom, and can remember it as far back as my shrinking brain allows. They are not typical sugar cookies, but somewhat soft and chewy - yes, they have a lot of fat, but then so does your MOM...and you still love HER, right? You also don't have to roll these out - rolling is OK for pies, but cookies are usually an immediate need...that is why so many people eat the gross, raw egg filled dough. Yes, I said it....DISGUSTING.
Our Favorite Cookie (It's just its name, don't get your panties in a bunch)
1/2 C. butter
1/2 C. shortening (butter flavor Crisco highly recommended)
1 C. sugar
1 tsp. vanilla
1 egg
2-1/2 C. flour
3/4 tsp. salt
1/2 tsp. soda
2 T. milk
Preheat oven to 400. Put a little sugar in a cereal bowl and find a glass with a nice, flat bottom and set aside. Beat butter, shortening, sugar, vanilla and egg in a large bowl until fluffy/creamy; add salt and soda and mix in, then flour and beat until incorporated, blending in milk last. Drop by teaspoonfuls (or cookie scoop) on cookie sheet at least an inch apart (they will spread), press the bottom of the glass in the dough in the bowl to make it sticky, then in the sugar and flatten the cookies slightly with it. Dip the glass in the sugar each time you flatten so they won't stick and all get sugar on em.
Bake at 400 for 7-10 minutes or until they just start to brown around the edges, let cool for a minute then remove to rack to cool completely. And if you have ANY of the first pan or milk in the fridge left before the second pan is done, you are not doing it right.
At Christmas I make these and put red and green sugar in separate bowls and flatten with that - you can sprinkle more on after you flatten to make them even prettier. I have also been known to drop the dough in a bowl of sprinkles or those tiny colored bb's, then set them right side up on the cookie sheet and flatten - decorate them however you want; shoot, if you put a prune on top even Harrison would eat em!
So what IS your favorite food? Haha, just kidding. Some people are easy - they have identified with a particular food and never sway from that - for instance with my Dad it's always been blackberry pie. Always. My grampa loved nuts. Well, at least we thought he did...it would be funny if he secretly hated them, especially after that Christmas when EVERY single present he opened contained nuts. I live in his house now, and wonder if in some future excavation we discover an archeological dig rife with Planters cans as far back as any of us can remember, all pristine and unopened. My big sister has an ongoing affair with gummy bears. Not worms, not cola bottles, but bears...and they must be Haribo. And she flushes the red and white ones down the toilet so she isn't tempted to eat them when she runs out of the yummy flavors...I am working on having her committed since everyone KNOWS those are the two bestest flavors in the bag. Once I bought her a 5 lb. bag and she told me "never do that again"....I suspect it was like the lost weekend, and that she woke up lying in her back yard with a fruity hangover and the dog licking the gummies stuck in her hair.
If I had to narrow it down to a category, I think the thing I would miss the most if I had to give it up is bread. Not just any bread, but warm from the oven, redolent with yeast, and (yes I know it's more than one food, but shut up and let me finish) with butter, preferably cold and very thinly sliced on each bite so you get the contrast of flavors, textures and temperatures. My gramma, whom I have mentioned before and not in the most glowing culinary terms, once made a wheat sourdough bread I will always hold other breads up against and to which they will always slink away from, trailing their sad little crumbs behind them. We were visiting her at the lake, and it smelled SOOOOO good, and the toast we made with it I can still remember to this day...the dense crumb, the slight heaviness, the tang of the sourdough, the melting butter...WOOF. Thanks Granny, you ROCK.
You'd think after all that I'd give you a recipe for bread. Nope. Someone requested a recipe for cookies that are adult AND kid friendly, and that had no prunes or raisins...an odd request, but if you knew the origin, you'd understand. And I don't care what Harrison says, prunes are delicious, and should be tossed into anything you make - it will give it a nuance and depth you cannot imagine, and will delight your body with TONS of antioxidants, potassium, iron and chromium for good blood health, vitamin A & C for beautiful skin and hair, Lutien for good eyesight and for slow-release sugars to keep your energy up, and of course fiber. Shit, prunes give you a run for your money! Hahahah....
These cookies are from a cookbook that my mom has had since I was a kid. It was a church cookbook, so it had recipes donated by parishoners....I think this one was actually donated BY my mom, and can remember it as far back as my shrinking brain allows. They are not typical sugar cookies, but somewhat soft and chewy - yes, they have a lot of fat, but then so does your MOM...and you still love HER, right? You also don't have to roll these out - rolling is OK for pies, but cookies are usually an immediate need...that is why so many people eat the gross, raw egg filled dough. Yes, I said it....DISGUSTING.
Our Favorite Cookie (It's just its name, don't get your panties in a bunch)
1/2 C. butter
1/2 C. shortening (butter flavor Crisco highly recommended)
1 C. sugar
1 tsp. vanilla
1 egg
2-1/2 C. flour
3/4 tsp. salt
1/2 tsp. soda
2 T. milk
Preheat oven to 400. Put a little sugar in a cereal bowl and find a glass with a nice, flat bottom and set aside. Beat butter, shortening, sugar, vanilla and egg in a large bowl until fluffy/creamy; add salt and soda and mix in, then flour and beat until incorporated, blending in milk last. Drop by teaspoonfuls (or cookie scoop) on cookie sheet at least an inch apart (they will spread), press the bottom of the glass in the dough in the bowl to make it sticky, then in the sugar and flatten the cookies slightly with it. Dip the glass in the sugar each time you flatten so they won't stick and all get sugar on em.
Bake at 400 for 7-10 minutes or until they just start to brown around the edges, let cool for a minute then remove to rack to cool completely. And if you have ANY of the first pan or milk in the fridge left before the second pan is done, you are not doing it right.
At Christmas I make these and put red and green sugar in separate bowls and flatten with that - you can sprinkle more on after you flatten to make them even prettier. I have also been known to drop the dough in a bowl of sprinkles or those tiny colored bb's, then set them right side up on the cookie sheet and flatten - decorate them however you want; shoot, if you put a prune on top even Harrison would eat em!
Thursday, October 7, 2010
"Support Group for Lactose Intolerants - milk & cookies provided"
I don't know that I have a story tonight...nothing is springing to mind, and the taco meat is getting cold. Maybe if I have a couple I will get inspired...brb. OK, I had a couple...tacos and margaritas, so let's keep this short and sweet and unmarred by unecessary profanity.
Tyler is a family friend - I would say my sons friend, because that's where it started, but just by sheer time spent in our house I think we can partially claim him on our taxes. He is a sweet guy, very affable and quite a do-it-yourselfer - he was the bartender and brewmeister that made all the beer and wine for Joey and Kira's wedding. It's not unusual for him to walk through the front door (he doesn't knock, he's family) carring a tank and a small keg of whatever his latest concoction is. He has been responsible for opening my mind a bit regarding mead and an absolutely lovely dark belgian beer called Brother Thelonius that you can only find at artsy-fartsy grocery stores like New Seasons, but mostly it's ales, which I despise with a white hot passion....not a big fan of the hop flavor, it reminds me of the stuff my mom used to put on my fingernails to encourage me to scrape it off with my teeth and still bite them down to the nubbins.
So anyway, I decided to post a cookie recipe in honor of Mr. Beer, alias Mr. Lactose Intolerant - he has not an ounce of extra flesh on his bones, and I always feel bad when I've made some luscious concoction and he can't eat it because it has dairy in it. Altho he did teach me that eating some yogurt with live cultures can counteract some of the "by products" his body creates when lactose products are consumed...cool beans! So here you go Tyler....I will be making some this weekend, so hopefully you'll make an appearance for a non-gaseous, cramp free treat!
Peanut Butter Cookies
(The name does not do it justice - should be PBOMG'S....pure heaven!)
1 C. shortening (I almost always use Crisco butter flavor)
2/3 C. peanut butter....probly doesn't matter, but Jif is my fave
1 C. brown sugar
1 C. white sugar
2 eggs
3 C. flour
2 tsp. baking soda
1 tsp. salt
1 tsp. vanilla
Preheat oven to 350. Cream shortening, peanut butter and sugars. Beat in eggs and vanilla, then add soda and salt and mix well. Add flour and beat until combined, form into balls or use a cookie scoop and place on cookie sheets. My recipe says to grease the pan, but I never have...I think the sugar keeps them from sticking. OH YEAH....you have to drop the scoops of cookie dough in a bowl with some sugar and roll them around in it, THEN put it on the cookie sheet...dang tequila. Using a fork, and dipping it in the sugar if it starts sticking, press an "x" on each scoop of dough with the fork, pressing the cookie down about halfway. Bake at 350 for about 10 minutes....it should be very lightly browned just around the edges....a tiny bit of shiny foaminess should be visible in the fork lines....that way they will not get crisp and hard. Nothing like overbaking to make me want to feed cookies to the dogs.....it has to be chewy or it just ain't right! Let stand on the pan for 1-2 minutes or they will fall apart and you will be left crying with a mouthful of burny-hot cookie lava - put on cooling racks as soon as possible though to keep them from overcooking on the hot pan. If you're under the influence of some blue agave, remember to turn off the oven...good thing I'm not baking tonight.
You could put chocolate chips in these, maybe Reeses Pieces, perhaps a Hershey's Kiss instead of forking them, or as I saw in another recipe, cook them in mini muffin tins and when they come out of the oven, press a whole mini Reeses peanut butter cup in the center....now there is a reason for "buffet pants" if I ever heard one! Or you could just keep them pristine...nothing but peanut butter, and a great big glass of icy cold milk...or in Tyler's case, a frothy glass of Ale-of-the-Week! Enjoy.....I don't recommend the beer option, but if it makes your inner fat lady sing, Gesunheidt (sp)!
Tyler is a family friend - I would say my sons friend, because that's where it started, but just by sheer time spent in our house I think we can partially claim him on our taxes. He is a sweet guy, very affable and quite a do-it-yourselfer - he was the bartender and brewmeister that made all the beer and wine for Joey and Kira's wedding. It's not unusual for him to walk through the front door (he doesn't knock, he's family) carring a tank and a small keg of whatever his latest concoction is. He has been responsible for opening my mind a bit regarding mead and an absolutely lovely dark belgian beer called Brother Thelonius that you can only find at artsy-fartsy grocery stores like New Seasons, but mostly it's ales, which I despise with a white hot passion....not a big fan of the hop flavor, it reminds me of the stuff my mom used to put on my fingernails to encourage me to scrape it off with my teeth and still bite them down to the nubbins.
So anyway, I decided to post a cookie recipe in honor of Mr. Beer, alias Mr. Lactose Intolerant - he has not an ounce of extra flesh on his bones, and I always feel bad when I've made some luscious concoction and he can't eat it because it has dairy in it. Altho he did teach me that eating some yogurt with live cultures can counteract some of the "by products" his body creates when lactose products are consumed...cool beans! So here you go Tyler....I will be making some this weekend, so hopefully you'll make an appearance for a non-gaseous, cramp free treat!
Peanut Butter Cookies
(The name does not do it justice - should be PBOMG'S....pure heaven!)
1 C. shortening (I almost always use Crisco butter flavor)
2/3 C. peanut butter....probly doesn't matter, but Jif is my fave
1 C. brown sugar
1 C. white sugar
2 eggs
3 C. flour
2 tsp. baking soda
1 tsp. salt
1 tsp. vanilla
Preheat oven to 350. Cream shortening, peanut butter and sugars. Beat in eggs and vanilla, then add soda and salt and mix well. Add flour and beat until combined, form into balls or use a cookie scoop and place on cookie sheets. My recipe says to grease the pan, but I never have...I think the sugar keeps them from sticking. OH YEAH....you have to drop the scoops of cookie dough in a bowl with some sugar and roll them around in it, THEN put it on the cookie sheet...dang tequila. Using a fork, and dipping it in the sugar if it starts sticking, press an "x" on each scoop of dough with the fork, pressing the cookie down about halfway. Bake at 350 for about 10 minutes....it should be very lightly browned just around the edges....a tiny bit of shiny foaminess should be visible in the fork lines....that way they will not get crisp and hard. Nothing like overbaking to make me want to feed cookies to the dogs.....it has to be chewy or it just ain't right! Let stand on the pan for 1-2 minutes or they will fall apart and you will be left crying with a mouthful of burny-hot cookie lava - put on cooling racks as soon as possible though to keep them from overcooking on the hot pan. If you're under the influence of some blue agave, remember to turn off the oven...good thing I'm not baking tonight.
You could put chocolate chips in these, maybe Reeses Pieces, perhaps a Hershey's Kiss instead of forking them, or as I saw in another recipe, cook them in mini muffin tins and when they come out of the oven, press a whole mini Reeses peanut butter cup in the center....now there is a reason for "buffet pants" if I ever heard one! Or you could just keep them pristine...nothing but peanut butter, and a great big glass of icy cold milk...or in Tyler's case, a frothy glass of Ale-of-the-Week! Enjoy.....I don't recommend the beer option, but if it makes your inner fat lady sing, Gesunheidt (sp)!
Wednesday, September 29, 2010
Time to hit the bars...
It's been an odd year so far for weather....I don't think we had extremes in winter, nor in spring this year in the Pacific NW, except for the length.....spring bit into summer for close to a full month, so we really didn't see much sun until July. That meant that stuff that was supposed to grow died from drowning, or grew so pitifully that it never caught up...the Oregonian Food Day did a big article on how to use your green tomatoes, and I bet it really pissed off those who picked em all right before we got this freakin indian summer! It is what it is, but it's definitely turning to fall. Nights are cooling off, leaves are falling, and it's almost October...what a gyp.
Summer is my favorite season, I just like the sunshine and blue skies against the backdrop of green trees - how can you NOT like that? I think I get seasonal affective disorder too...that would explain the bitchy during the darker months, but you'll have to think of another reason for the summer ones, haha. But there are things I like about fall too, don't get me wrong. Where I work there are tons of little tiny maple trees, with little tiny leaves, and they are amazing shades of yellow, orange, red and brown that just don't quit...this morning I walked through them all damp with dew, and on my way out tonight I got to crunch them 'cause they dried out and curled up and they sounded like potato chips. I didn't even mind that they were all over my car...I just drove really fast to blow them all off.
I also like fall food - no one really wants to cook or bake in a hot kitchen (as Denice knows oh too well), so we do a lot of bbq, grilling and even sandwiches to avoid getting all hot and bothered. But soon it will cool off, and I for one love to hang out in a warm kitchen that smells yummy - fall is full of flavors and spices that totally turn me on.....apple and turkey and pot roast, oh my! Stuffing and cookies and chicken pot pie! Yes, these are a few of my favorite things, and one of the best, and something I always crack out for both my and my sweetie's co-workers are the smash hit Pumpkin Bars. They will not be ignored, Dan; people on diets will curse me with pumpkin scented breath, diabetics will shake ever so slightly while their blood sugar spikes as they lick the frosting off their fingers, vegans will break their own hippie code and deny the egg that lies within....you can't say no to a pumpkin bar, it's just not possible. So enjoy this FREAKIN EASY recipe, and be prepared to be offered indecent proposals from all who draw near - they are definitely a Top Ten favorite of my loyal "taste testers"!
Pumpkin Bars (such an unassuming name for manna from the heavens)
1 C. vegetable oil (YES, I DID SAY ONE CUP)
4 eggs
2 C. sugar
2 C. pumpkin (from a can unless you're Martha Stewart or Amish)
2 C. flour
1 tsp. baking soda
2 tsp. baking powder
1/2 tsp. salt
1 tsp. pumpkin pie spice (yes, it does need more than cinnamon)
1 tsp. cinnamon
1 tsp. vanilla
Preheat oven to 350; grease a 15x10 jelly roll pan (those big cookie sheets from Costco). Cream together oil, eggs and sugar, add pumpkin and mix well. Add dry ingredients and vanilla and beat until smooth. Pour into prepared pan and bake at 350 for 25-35 minutes, until toothpick comes out clean or center springs back when pressed lightly. You can't screw it up, it's never happened in the history of the universe. Let cool completely.
Cream Cheese Icing
6 oz. cream cheese, softened
5 T. butter, soft
3 to 3-3/4 C. powdered sugar
1 tsp. vanilla
1 T. milk, or as needed
Beat cream cheese and butter together, add 3 C. of powdered sugar and vanilla and beat well. If it needs to be thicker, add up to 3/4 C. more sugar, and if you need to thin it down at all add a little milk.
Spread icing over entire uncut pan, then cut into bars or squares of your choosing and size. I like to cut around the edges first and pull all those ones out of the pan - it gives you more room to cut the center and all those edge scraps that are useless to anyone....except, perhaps your dog (wink, wink). I usually decorate them with a candy corn on each one - not everyone likes them, but it's fun to have candy corn spitting contests and it keeps the plastic wrap from ripping all the frosting off when you get them to work. Like anyone cares...there are people I work with who would clothesline their gramma to lick off my saran wrap.
Enjoy my ridiculously simple yet drop dead moist, spicy and creamy fall offering, and do not bitch if your pants don't fit for a couple days - no one told you to eat seven of them, you piglet.
Summer is my favorite season, I just like the sunshine and blue skies against the backdrop of green trees - how can you NOT like that? I think I get seasonal affective disorder too...that would explain the bitchy during the darker months, but you'll have to think of another reason for the summer ones, haha. But there are things I like about fall too, don't get me wrong. Where I work there are tons of little tiny maple trees, with little tiny leaves, and they are amazing shades of yellow, orange, red and brown that just don't quit...this morning I walked through them all damp with dew, and on my way out tonight I got to crunch them 'cause they dried out and curled up and they sounded like potato chips. I didn't even mind that they were all over my car...I just drove really fast to blow them all off.
I also like fall food - no one really wants to cook or bake in a hot kitchen (as Denice knows oh too well), so we do a lot of bbq, grilling and even sandwiches to avoid getting all hot and bothered. But soon it will cool off, and I for one love to hang out in a warm kitchen that smells yummy - fall is full of flavors and spices that totally turn me on.....apple and turkey and pot roast, oh my! Stuffing and cookies and chicken pot pie! Yes, these are a few of my favorite things, and one of the best, and something I always crack out for both my and my sweetie's co-workers are the smash hit Pumpkin Bars. They will not be ignored, Dan; people on diets will curse me with pumpkin scented breath, diabetics will shake ever so slightly while their blood sugar spikes as they lick the frosting off their fingers, vegans will break their own hippie code and deny the egg that lies within....you can't say no to a pumpkin bar, it's just not possible. So enjoy this FREAKIN EASY recipe, and be prepared to be offered indecent proposals from all who draw near - they are definitely a Top Ten favorite of my loyal "taste testers"!
Pumpkin Bars (such an unassuming name for manna from the heavens)
1 C. vegetable oil (YES, I DID SAY ONE CUP)
4 eggs
2 C. sugar
2 C. pumpkin (from a can unless you're Martha Stewart or Amish)
2 C. flour
1 tsp. baking soda
2 tsp. baking powder
1/2 tsp. salt
1 tsp. pumpkin pie spice (yes, it does need more than cinnamon)
1 tsp. cinnamon
1 tsp. vanilla
Preheat oven to 350; grease a 15x10 jelly roll pan (those big cookie sheets from Costco). Cream together oil, eggs and sugar, add pumpkin and mix well. Add dry ingredients and vanilla and beat until smooth. Pour into prepared pan and bake at 350 for 25-35 minutes, until toothpick comes out clean or center springs back when pressed lightly. You can't screw it up, it's never happened in the history of the universe. Let cool completely.
Cream Cheese Icing
6 oz. cream cheese, softened
5 T. butter, soft
3 to 3-3/4 C. powdered sugar
1 tsp. vanilla
1 T. milk, or as needed
Beat cream cheese and butter together, add 3 C. of powdered sugar and vanilla and beat well. If it needs to be thicker, add up to 3/4 C. more sugar, and if you need to thin it down at all add a little milk.
Spread icing over entire uncut pan, then cut into bars or squares of your choosing and size. I like to cut around the edges first and pull all those ones out of the pan - it gives you more room to cut the center and all those edge scraps that are useless to anyone....except, perhaps your dog (wink, wink). I usually decorate them with a candy corn on each one - not everyone likes them, but it's fun to have candy corn spitting contests and it keeps the plastic wrap from ripping all the frosting off when you get them to work. Like anyone cares...there are people I work with who would clothesline their gramma to lick off my saran wrap.
Enjoy my ridiculously simple yet drop dead moist, spicy and creamy fall offering, and do not bitch if your pants don't fit for a couple days - no one told you to eat seven of them, you piglet.
Friday, July 30, 2010
Family fruitcakes
OK, here is the 3rd in the trilogy of unrelated recipes...except of course that they are all coming from ME! Sorry Pam, didn't make it before your lake trip, which sounds like fun but not enough to drive that far for a day trip - if I'm going to get carsick, it's got to be for a REALLY good reason!
I have 4 brother-in-laws, all of them peaches, but the one I've had the longest really cracks me up. He's a funny guy, and has all kind of old-timey quotes he throws out in normal conversation without even thinking about it...he looked really puzzled the time I started laughing when he was discussing dirt-biking and a particularly sharply angled hill being "Steeper 'n a cow's face" - his response was "Well, it is!", and I can't fault him for accuracy! It may have been some kind of spidey sense or something, but a couple years ago I got this recipe from my niece, and made him a batch for his birthday - his reaction was quite charming. He said they were his favorite (I knew that), and that his mom used to make him a batch every year for his birthday, but she hadn't the last couple years. BIL SCORE! The only thing that would have made it better for him would have been an ale and a cigar....while he watched a baseball game.
So here is the recipe, but I have issues with the name - this in no way, shape or form resembles the dread "Christmas Fruitcake" that has ruined that name for so many. It does have fruit in it, but not the nasty candied kind that comes in colors usually reserved for tacky stained glass candle holders purchased at your nearby Dollar Tree, or those little suckers that come in a long strand of plastic you're supposed to share with 19 other people with no taste buds. If I told you a couple stories about how those candied fruits were made, you wouldn't DREAM of putting them in something you put in your mouth....my husband worked at a plant that produced them and he would die before eating that crap. No, this has good dried fruit, and you can choose the combination - just head to your local Winco and peruse the bulk foods section...it's got 'em all!
Mark's Favorite Fruitcake Cookies
3/4 c. sugar
1/2 c. margarine or butter
2 eggs
1 tsp. brandy extract (DO NOT substitute...it's essential!) ((I MEAN IT))
3/4 tsp. baking powder
1/2 tsp. salt
1/4 tsp. baking soda
1/2 tsp. cinnamon
1-1/2 c. flour
1 c. dried fruit, chopped (what kind you ask? See below)
1 c. dates, chopped (the ones I get in bulk are already like pellets)
1 c. chocolate chips
1/2 c. walnuts, chopped (it says nuts, but Mark grows/LOVES walnuts..do the math)
Cream together butter and sugars - my daughter says she read somewhere that the fluffier you cream the butter and sugar, the better cookie you will get - has to do with the sugar completely dissolving or some such nonsense. But her cookies the other night were da BOMB! Add eggs, extract, baking powder and soda, salt and cinnamon and mix well. Add flour and beat until smooth, stir in fruit and nuts. Drop by teaspoon or cookie scoopfuls on cookie sheet and bake at 350 for 10-12 minutes; remove from sheet while still hot and cool on rack.
OK, dried fruit. If you find a package of something called a "dried fruit mix", you could use that - it's usually already chopped enough for this recipe. If not, use a variety, which could include regular and golden raisins, currants, dried apples, pears, apricots, pineapple, cherries, cranberries, kiwi, strawberries etc. - you know, dried fruit. Once I used the fruit in a bag of Kirkland fruit/nut mix, but had to separate all the nuts because I just wanted the walnuts...it was a big pain and there were hardly any cherries in the cookies because I kept picking them out to make sure they weren't "bad". But do what you like - but I would not recommend banana chips. Because that would be wrong.
Oh, and this would definitely be a great dessert after the mac and cheese....dried fruit shoots through you like sh** through a goose! Thanks again Mark....;-D
I have 4 brother-in-laws, all of them peaches, but the one I've had the longest really cracks me up. He's a funny guy, and has all kind of old-timey quotes he throws out in normal conversation without even thinking about it...he looked really puzzled the time I started laughing when he was discussing dirt-biking and a particularly sharply angled hill being "Steeper 'n a cow's face" - his response was "Well, it is!", and I can't fault him for accuracy! It may have been some kind of spidey sense or something, but a couple years ago I got this recipe from my niece, and made him a batch for his birthday - his reaction was quite charming. He said they were his favorite (I knew that), and that his mom used to make him a batch every year for his birthday, but she hadn't the last couple years. BIL SCORE! The only thing that would have made it better for him would have been an ale and a cigar....while he watched a baseball game.
So here is the recipe, but I have issues with the name - this in no way, shape or form resembles the dread "Christmas Fruitcake" that has ruined that name for so many. It does have fruit in it, but not the nasty candied kind that comes in colors usually reserved for tacky stained glass candle holders purchased at your nearby Dollar Tree, or those little suckers that come in a long strand of plastic you're supposed to share with 19 other people with no taste buds. If I told you a couple stories about how those candied fruits were made, you wouldn't DREAM of putting them in something you put in your mouth....my husband worked at a plant that produced them and he would die before eating that crap. No, this has good dried fruit, and you can choose the combination - just head to your local Winco and peruse the bulk foods section...it's got 'em all!
Mark's Favorite Fruitcake Cookies
3/4 c. sugar
1/2 c. margarine or butter
2 eggs
1 tsp. brandy extract (DO NOT substitute...it's essential!) ((I MEAN IT))
3/4 tsp. baking powder
1/2 tsp. salt
1/4 tsp. baking soda
1/2 tsp. cinnamon
1-1/2 c. flour
1 c. dried fruit, chopped (what kind you ask? See below)
1 c. dates, chopped (the ones I get in bulk are already like pellets)
1 c. chocolate chips
1/2 c. walnuts, chopped (it says nuts, but Mark grows/LOVES walnuts..do the math)
Cream together butter and sugars - my daughter says she read somewhere that the fluffier you cream the butter and sugar, the better cookie you will get - has to do with the sugar completely dissolving or some such nonsense. But her cookies the other night were da BOMB! Add eggs, extract, baking powder and soda, salt and cinnamon and mix well. Add flour and beat until smooth, stir in fruit and nuts. Drop by teaspoon or cookie scoopfuls on cookie sheet and bake at 350 for 10-12 minutes; remove from sheet while still hot and cool on rack.
OK, dried fruit. If you find a package of something called a "dried fruit mix", you could use that - it's usually already chopped enough for this recipe. If not, use a variety, which could include regular and golden raisins, currants, dried apples, pears, apricots, pineapple, cherries, cranberries, kiwi, strawberries etc. - you know, dried fruit. Once I used the fruit in a bag of Kirkland fruit/nut mix, but had to separate all the nuts because I just wanted the walnuts...it was a big pain and there were hardly any cherries in the cookies because I kept picking them out to make sure they weren't "bad". But do what you like - but I would not recommend banana chips. Because that would be wrong.
Oh, and this would definitely be a great dessert after the mac and cheese....dried fruit shoots through you like sh** through a goose! Thanks again Mark....;-D
Wednesday, July 14, 2010
Take 2 cookies and call me in the morning...
Today I went to work like every other day, but cut the day short to attend a "Celebration of Life" for a co-worker. Listening to family and friends talk about this person and the life they led made me think how much we take day-to-day friendships and acquaintances for granted, and how difficult it would have been for me had it been someone I was really close to. I had an unsteady peace with this person, and now feel terrible that I was probably the only person she didn't like based on testimony delivered - my guilt is alive, well and really kicking my ass today.
I am a Catholic of the 60's...not the late 60's Flying Nun, peace and love, Jesus sitting cross-legged in a circle of happy children and cute non-rabid animals kind, but the fire and brimstone and demons with rusty pitchforks and "hell is whatever you hate or are afraid of the most" 60's kind of Catholic. Mom had me convinced that if I didn't straighten up and fly right I was going to spend eternity in a flaming room filled up to my neck in spiders, an endless supply of dirty dishes to handwash, and a constant force-feeding of her nasty fried liver. I don't think I believe THAT particular version quite so much anymore, but regardless think that it's not a pleasant place and I sure don't want to be assigned a room even if "Everyone else is going".
Back to guilt. I can't get away from it, it follows me everywhere and touches every part of my life - Jewish mothers have nothin' on me. So I have two ways to work on it: either pretend it's not there (never works for me, but it does for other family members), or try to make up for my shortcomings in some other way. So last night I made cookies. Lots and lots of cookies. I volunteered to do something for the service that I knew would help, and hope that somewhere, someone is erasing some time out of my purgatory account book...and that hell is NOT making cookies because I'm really tired of that.
This is my favorite cookie...and if you recall a different post, you'll know why....
Molasses Crinkles
1 cup packed brown sugar
3/4 cup shortening
1/4 cup molasses
1 egg
2 tsp. baking soda
1 tsp. ground cinnamon
1 tsp. ground ginger
1/2 tsp. ground cloves
1/4 tsp. salt
2-1/4 cup flour
Granulated sugar
Mix brown sugar, shortening, molasses and eggs until fluffy. Add soda, spices and salt and mix in, then add flour and beat until combined. Cover and refrigerate at least one hour.
Preheat oven to 375. Shape chilled dough into 1" balls ( I use a cookie scoop, or you can use an ice cream scoop (the kind with the little wire that scrapes it out of the scoop) and cut them in quarters. They don't really need to be rolled into balls....they spread out nicely and are soft enough to sort of shape themselves in the sugar. Roll in granulated sugar and place on cookie sheet a few inches apart. They do spread a little, so try not to crowd them too much unless you like one big cookie with holes in it. Bake at 375 just until set, 10-12 minutes - and when I say "just until set", it means just what it says....you may think they're still raw. These cookies crack all over the top, and when they are done, you will see just a tiny bit of moistness still in the cracks...you'll see what I mean when you make them. If you wait until they look dry in the cracks, they will be hard and now chewy...then they are NOT my favorite cookie. Just sayin....and let them sit in the pan for about a minute (unless you want them to fall apart in a delicious mess that will only go down with a big glass of ice cold milk) THEN remove from cookie sheets and cool on racks.
A shout out to the 1978 Betty Crocker's Cookbook...the dirtiest cookbook I own, Kudo's Betty!
Subscribe to:
Posts (Atom)